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I don’t think Christina Aguilera herself knew what she was doing when she put this dress on.

Like, are her boobs themselves pregnant? There has to be an explanation for why her chest is so glorious. Well the obvious was that she indeed had a baby, but maybe there were triplets she didn’t know about who escaped the womb for easier access to breast feeding.

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Shout out to Ellen for not doing what we’re all thinking, which was have our pupils turn into hearts while we bash in our skulls with a mallet like a cartoon character.