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• textured - May 22 2008 | music

  "In a modern world in which irony slices through the mainstream, pervading everything from the New York Times book review on down to the heavy metal press and even teeny-bopper magazines, you might almost forget that once upon a time you could release an album featuring yourself clad in shiny black plastic, skin-tight pants with the word "ZAP" emblazoned across your crotch in dayglo pink, while avoiding irony altogether.

  I weep for the Devastatin' Daves of today, who cannot get up in a sleeveless, shoulder-padded red and black striped shirt with a greased back pelt-mullet, without someone shouting "trendsetter!" at him in the street. Indeed, New York's trendiest clubs are full of DD wanabees, who will never have an ounce of the authenticity of Dave.

  Need menace? Throw on some fingerless black motorcycle gloves, grow a 'stache and lose the irony!

  Need to shift some units? Push out your crotch, with its generous package, and pink it up with some snazzy font!

  Dave, you turntable legend, I salute you.

  Here's to the death of irony."

  • textured - May 22 2008
    

    i. need. this. song. nowwwwwww.

    Rip dibby zap, da zip dap du wap,
    This is what I call the Zip Zap Rap
    Hichichichy be back in a sec,
    Zippy zippa zappa gonna spend your whole cheque,

    Zip dip zap, a zip wit a wabbit,
    Zippy dipa wippa got a cocaine habit,
    Scooby dooby bip a zip bop blam,
    It started with a quarter now it is a gram

    (...)

    Don't be a fool,
    Stay in school!
    Don't get high and drive a car,
    You will not get very far

    (...)

    Don't be a dope,
    Don't smoke that coke!
    We're talkin' bout cocaine,
    Its not good for your brain

    ...zippi dippy doopy scooby wooby and so on....

  • shadowpuppetmaster - May 22 2008
    

    classic.