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OMG.
Quoted: "I am very, very concerned about my extensive contact with gold medals," Mr. Phelps told reporters. "But what am I supposed to do? Stop being so awesome?"
ADDITION : JUST FOUND OUT THIS IS A JOKE. THE AUTHOR OF THIS ARTICLE IS A COMEDIAN - THANK YOU JESUS!
Quoted: The medals, which were supposed to be made entirely of gold, were instead found to be composed of 99% lead alloy and coated with a gold-colored lead-based paint.
...
The shocking revelations roiled the Olympic complex today and sent officials looking for answers from the Chinese manufacturer of the medals, the Wuhan One Hundred Percent Gold Medal Corporation.
...
"We are trying to determine how exactly so much lead got into those gold medals," said a spokesman for Wuhan, China's largest exporter of gold medals. "Until we do, we are urging all first-place athletes not to lick, taste or suck on their medals."
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WOW... how did they think that this was okay or that they'd get away with it.
Think they'd have learned their lesson after all the toy recalls.
the best is the spokesman's response. - we don't know how all that lead got there... come on! you guys made the friggin' medals?! how can you NOT know?
and it's 99% lead! not 2%, or 5% - but 99%!!!!
i'm assuming you guys have read that fine print at the bottom:
"Andy Borowitz is a comedian and writer whose work appears in The New Yorker and The New York Times, and at his award-winning humor site, BorowitzReport.com. He hosts "Countdown to the Election, with special guests Joy Behar (The View) and Jeffrey Toobin (CNN, bestselling author of "The Nine") at the 92nd Street Y in NYC on October 22 at 8 PM. Student tickets half-price. For tickets go to 92y.org."
but even if you didn't...the bit about the chinese gymnast should have tipped you off...
AH! It's a joke?!? I feel so duped and relieved at the same time.
DOH!
wow - i feel like an ass...
here's another goodie: http://news.yahoo.com/s/uc/20080816/cm_uc_crabox/op_477070;_ylt=Al_zl._cyIDq7aJi57H2PhlxFb8C