This is the story Javon Walker is allegedly telling in regards to his recent robbery:

Quoted: “I was just back at my room and at about 5:30 in the morning I got a knock at the door. I opened it and 3 guys with guns were there. They cracked me in the head a few times, knocking me unconscious. They then robbed me of everything I had; my watch, money, everything! Somehow they got me to a car and dropped me off in the street. That’s what happened.”

The name of his hotel? The Bellagio in Las Vegas. Somehow nobody saw any of this?

Holier than thou, even from the afterlife. With this subscription service you can send one last message to friends and family left behind after The Rapture. All you need to do is make a list of the people you think are damned (up to 62 email addresses!!) and hand it over.

Quoted: Our purpose is to get one last message to the lost, at a time, when they might just be willing to hear it for the first and last time...We have set up a system to send documents by the email, to the addresses you provide, 6 days after the "Rapture" of the Church. This occurs when 3 of our 5 team members scattered around the U.S fail to log in over a 3 day period. Another 3 days are given to fail safe any false triggering of the system.

I believe this also the method (with fake cattle herds) they use to catch stray cows. At least this makes sense. Cows are just stupid.

Quoted: A German nursing home has created a pretend bus stop to prevent Alzheimer's patients from wandering off...The chairman of the local care association says since the patients' long term memory works better than their short, the patients know the bus stop means waiting there will take them back home. So nursing home staff say when wandering patients wait at the bus stop, they can approach them, tell them the bus is coming later and invite them in for coffee so the patients are not in any danger. The idea is reportedly so successful that several other homes across Germany are adopting it.

Playoff hockey. Serious business.

Quoted: You can buy an octopus this week at Wholey's Fish Market in Pittsburgh -- unless you're wearing Detroit Red Wings gear..."I have the utmost respect for all the people of Detroit," Wholey said, according to the report. "They are great citizens and great hockey fans, just like I am. But I'm a Penguins fan first and foremost and I want to see the Penguins win, period." If that means checking ID and listening for customers with Midwestern accents, that's what he's willing to do.

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About 2 mins in some Detroit area 6th graders take Monica Conyers to task over her childish behavior in a city council meeting.

Quoted: Detroit City Councilwoman Monica Conyers is confronted by middle School children about her comments made to Detroit City Council President Kenneth Cockrel Jr...

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I think its officially time to put Detroit in the hands of OCP and Robocop... Shrek!!

Quoted: A Detroit City Council special investigative session into a police whistle-blower lawsuit settlement erupted into a yelling match when President Pro Tem Monica Conyers made claims that she was being disrespected. The argument began when Conyers asked an independent attorney who was testifying if the council could be sued by Detroit residents for approving the $8.4-million lawsuit settlement.

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What the hell is wrong with Canada? Evidently these ads run on television as some sort of accident prevention awareness.

Quoted: This is a compilation of all the Prevent-it.ca accident clips.

I find this to be incredibly fascinating. Similar to a video game like Resident Evil, only instead of zombies you have protesters attacking you and your entourage.

Quoted: In bizarre scenes, Chinese security guards and hundreds of police fought running battles with protesters against the plight of Tibet. Terrified athletes and celebrities carrying the torch were forced to run for cover. Downing Street was privately furious as the embarrassing fiasco - costing £1million and likened to "Chinese police-state tactics" in London - was beamed around the world on TV.

Unfortunately it didn't involve the casts of Laguna Beach and The Hills. Come to think of it, I can't even remember the last time I watched MTV. I was struggling to name a third big show that I could include in my ridicule, but I realized I haven't seen or heard anyone talk about anything even remotely related to MTV in at least 3 or 4 months.

Quoted: A recent series of commercials produced by MTV's youth networking website, Think MTV, poses an interesting conundrum to the modern television viewer. Using the Holocaust as the backdrop for what could befall America if we are "not careful," the 30-second spots questions the integrity of the network for using an example that remains fresh in the memories and minds of a culture...The first, Subway Roundup, starts off on a NY underground car that buckles along shakily. The lights go out; the faces of riders are nervous, or disinterested; the car rocks side to side, apparently mimicking concentration camp railways. When the car stops, fierce officers gaze in, machine guns cocked. They lead the riders out in a single line fashion, sometimes pushing, forming an orderly line. The final image dissolves into Nazi Germany.