The FJM guys sure are having fun w/ the Mitchell Report, mostly at the expense of Clemens and Pettite, which is really wonderful in my opinion.

Quoted: "To be honest, my thoughts were: 'O.K., how's my body going to hold up? I can't take Vioxx anymore,' " Clemens said.

Quoted: It's cool. You can keep having a guy stick you in your back door meat with Winstrol. Remember Winstrol? It turned your arm into magic again.

I was secretly pleased that we had a good excuse to let Rogers go elsewhere, but I guess now we'll be overpaying by slightly less than we might have if Boras was in on the deal.

Quoted: Rogers has dismissed Boras and now is representing himself in contract negotiations, multiple baseball sources confirmed Friday afternoon.

Update on the previous dot. This is really disappointing commentary from Gammons. It isn't like A-Rod canceled the World Series or anything - wouldn't you want a big stage for an announcement like that?

But anyway, Buyer Beware - beware that A-Rod might not put his life on hold for two other baseball teams. He may not pay proper respect to cancer survivor Jon Lester and short-stature overcomer Dustin Pedroia. Also, white guys both. Real grinders. True Sox. A-Rod, on the other hand, a real a**hole.

Quoted: "Dustin Pedroia and Jon Lester are doing what Alex has never done: playing in a World Series game. And to want the attention on this day is kind of a sad commentary and it might be a bit of a ‘buyer beware,’ because, again, he’s never played in a World Series game…maybe there’s a reason.”

Seems like a good choice. Will Peter Gammons blast the Yankees for announcing this when the world spotlight should be on the Sox? Because that's what he did to A-Rod for declining his option right after the Sox won. Which seems petty and unfair of him to say. Just enjoy your World Series victory, Gammons.

Quoted: The Yankees officially offered their managerial job to Joe Girardi Monday morning and he is expected to accept it, a source has told 1050 ESPN New York's Andrew Marchand.

Sounds like a "thank you" more than a decision about the future. Oh well, can't say I disagree with the move.

Quoted: The Detroit Tigers decided Ivan Rodriguez was worth another $13 million.

After a little research, my suspicions were confirmed: this story is a hoax. I probably wouldn't have followed up if not for the part about Jake rebuffing the Yankees' recruiting efforts. I did notice the "Irving Clifford" mention, but missed its significance.

Quoted: I first heard about Jake Floyd last summer. I was doing research on minor league franchises when someone mentioned that a small-town team in Arizona had a 12-year-old as its general manager. At first I’d assumed it was the latest in a long tradition of minor league publicity stunts, like the club in New Hampshire that let the skier Bode Miller play left field, or those teams in Kansas City that played a couple of innings of their game on a Microsoft Xbox.

I found this in Todd Jones' blog and became an instant fan of his writing. I'm not sure if the "sever his arms" part is verbatim from mlb's letter, but it makes for enjoyable reading.

Quoted: And get this: When Joel Zumaya got new tattoos, he didn't check with MLB on the color schemes, so he has been told to sever his arms or wear long sleeves when he pitches. Perhaps MLB could cut a deal with an ink company and come up with authentic tats for all the guys.

Quoted: The loading of the truck is a annual rite of spring, albeit a quiet, cold one.

Yeah, this is the kind of Tigers story I'm entitled to dot now that we're the defending AL champs. Get used to it.