This is my favorite story out of Ryan Boudinot's new book, "The Littlest Hitler."

Lucky you! You can read it for free...

Quoted: "We're thinking about it," Katherine said, avoiding eye contact with me. If she had looked at me while saying it, the statement would have meant one thing. When you say, "We're thinking about it" and smile and look into each other's eyes, it means you intend to reproduce. When you look straight ahead and avoid eye contact with your lover it means the topic is a point of contention. I wanted to have a kid, she didn't, that was our story, and sure I blamed the abortion for it. We'd even resisted getting officially married, ostensibly in protest that gay people couldn't get married, but mostly because the ceremony and psychological transformations involved really freaked us out. As Katherine put it, she didn't want to toss a whole meat-and-cheese tray off the bow of a boat just because someone brought the wrong nail-polish remover.