a dud? this came out last week i think. ive watched the first part every night before going out and then stop it right before the fat hippie shows up. its been a magic-maker.

the other night my turkish friend was so inspired he bought 50 shots of tequila in a 45-minute period. FLIFF, FLIFF *NOT EVEN COUNTING IT*!! this is the new catch phrase. the funniest part, though, is that it wasnt even his money and he had showed up that night with like 80 cents in his pocket and left with three euro!

sadly that night i barfed HARD when i got home. uggh. first time in ages. i was like 'damn you, brad neely! why is there always a part two?!'

LOLLL! great story. yeah, i've made it a point to use the word "fliff" whenever i can...people seem to know exactly what i'm talking about..

i think i might even define brad neely as the greatest comedic force since eddie murphy. and eddie murphy would easily be the greatest living comedian, simply on the basis of his 1980s stand-up. a close third would be monty python, then kids in the hall. after that i could probably call it quits, unless we wanted to go back to chaplin and the marx bros and the surrealists, who would fill out the 20thC. am i missing anything? i guess a few 'in living color' skits would have to be acknowledged, as well. oh and ricky gervais and christopher guest, et al... and andy kaufman, the 70-80s golden era snl lineup, rick moranis, bill murray, bill hicks, lenny bruce, andrew dice clay. yeah.. ok i think my pantheon is complete.

i would flesh it out with The Simpsons, but you'd probably have to go writer by writer on that one.

ha. i keep forgetting shit.

sealab 2021?

wait, andrew dice clay?!?! fuck that guy, for every funny joke there are at least three which retroactively negate the comedy of the one that preceded them...

you could just say matt groening and conan obrian. oh and george meyer. also mel brooks is really funny at times.

yeah, but if you watch the simpsons dvds, you find out who's responsible for which jokes and usually there are certain dimensions of the show's comedy that a single writer can take consistent cred for....

hmm.. i dunno. whats that dude who wrote most the episodes? there usulaly the best ones. but the conan episodes are gems, and george meyer is a mastermind of sorts.

the andrew dice clay joke where he begins 'little boy blue... he needed the money' has been my favorite joke since i was thirteen. im not going back on it now!

john swartzwelder! (wiki to the rescue)

woah! did you know ricky gervais guest-wrote a simpsons episode last year? id like to watch that one. its called 'homer, this is your wife'

oh yeah, that joke...how does it go? when i was 12 my friend and i would recite that shit back and forth all the time...i maybe that one survives the retroactive sublation into shittyness...

retroactive. sublation. into... shittyness.

right now i'm sitting in a cafe, in the front where there are these big windows looking out onto the sidewalk. there's a really old dude outside who has been walking the block back and forth for the last two hours. he's wearing this reeallyy, really tight white shirt and, on it, in giant block letters, it reads:

"THE DON"

I think he's waiting for a dance seen and some explosive briefcases....

we've made eye contact five times now. it's really weirding me out...

(please don't let the don kill me-please don't let the don kill me-please don't let the don kill me-please don't let the don kill me)...

oohp! IT'S DON!!! (again)

its don! its don! its don its don its don! donDON!

i'm so tempted to run outside with a leap and and nice skid the next time he walks by, open my arms oh so fucking wide, and sing,

"IT'S THE DOOOOOOOOONNN!!!!!"

oh, and of course, then proceed to dance-walk around him, singing The Don song